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Transcript:Let me get this straight. You make a spinoff to the beloved modern iteration of a classical series going back decades, and you somehow decide to center it around the most boring motherfucker of the initial roster and his harpy sister?
Really? Sylvando was RIGHT fucking there! Or how bout a kung-fu adventure about Master Roshi and his hot sidekick? No? But after playing the game you’re kinda glad the actual likeable characters dodged a bullet because this is just baby’s first Dragon Quest with a fucking Pokemon coloring book thrown in. Run around with monsters to dig up treasure and fight in shitty effortless real time combat for a story that’s just— I wouldn’t have thought you could make a viking pirate adventure boring but here we are. Skip.
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